Feminism: noun. The advocacy of women’s rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes. Equality: noun. The state or quality of being equal. Equal: adjective. Like for each member of a group, class, or society.

Where is the contradiction in this logical progression? I fail to see it, but I often feel alone in that failure. Their voices are always louder — the voices of the people who disagree. “The advocacy of only women’s rights is at odds with our understanding of equality,” he tried to tell me yesterday, as if the focus on the female was somehow offensive. “If you don’t want people to disagree with you or misunderstand what the movement stands for then you should change the name.” But the name does reflect the movement. He watched me choke on my words, and interrupted with: “It’s like… why do we park in a driveway and drive on a parkway? There you have the same problem! Ugh, drives me nuts.” I didn’t know what to say. The attempt to remedy an immeasurably long history of inequality was boiled down to an issue of pure semantics right before my eyes. It was reduced to an item on a list of “Things to Ponder” on funnytab.net, which, just as it sounds, looks like it was graphically designed by a toddler and made to give your computer a virus. “Feminism” was given the weight of a brain teaser, and I didn’t even know what to say. If I’d had the balls- … If I’d had the courage, here is what I would have said:

Women have the right to run for president. The first woman did so in 1872. But the United States is yet to see a female president. Is that equality? Women have the right to hold every position in the workplace. In fact, women make up about half of the workforce. But less than 5% of CEOs at S&P 500 companies are women. Is that equality?

Equal treatment in the way we understand has not and will not bridge these gaps. Achieving equality means advocating for women. Look inside yourself, and you’ll see why. 

Process notes:

Once I settled on pursuing the dictionary definition portion of this prompt, I struggled to pick the right word. After our first object prompt, I knew that I had to choose carefully, and that my decision would set the tone of the piece. I started out with “equality,” and envisioned a character who felt like the definition of the word was an oversimplification that lacked sensitivity for a long history of sexism in our country and the world. I was reminded of the controversy surrounding the label “feminism” and how often it is misinterpreted to mean that women should receive better treatment rather than equal treatment. While I’m not sure if this would be classified as a fictional “story” seeing that my piece is a lot less plot-driven than Keene’s, I still tried to keep tone in mind. I tried to mimic Keene’s seemingly objective perspective by incorporating facts and statistics into my character’s processing to emphasize a similar brutal, irrefutable inferiority. At the same time, I also included the more personal introduction to those facts in order to develop empathy in the reader for the narrator and to emulate the thought process of someone still experiencing these issues today. Without over-narrating, I attempted to use this story to advocate for equity over equality.

Southern Lady Code: a technique by which, if you don’t have something nice to say, you say something not so nice in a nice way

In truth, I’m not sure why I expected to be met with anything different. I agreed to go to the party at the behest of my mother, who had so kindly tolerated the scorpions that my grandmother called her friends the month before. She said that everyone we cared about would be there, even the Gentrys, an older couple who ran the local Cotillion chapter that I had taught during high school. That should have been the first clue that something unpleasant would go down. Mrs. Gentry had always been a bit of a tool, ranging somewhere on the mean girl scale between Regina George and fucking Paris Hilton if the two were old, sour Southern women. I tolerated her for all those years because I was obligated. Now, that obligation was over. I was, however, still tied to my grandmother through blood and jewelry, so I donned my red pantsuit (“very holiday appropriate,” she said) and pearls, girded my loins, and walked into that hotel under the influence of far too much shiraz.

It was the final comment of the evening that got me. I dodged comments about my weight (“your face looks so much slimmer, sweetheart!”), major (“hope you have a good backup plan”), and love life (“I don’t see a ring on your finger yet, darling.”) for a whole hour and a half until my grandma pulled me over to see Mrs. Gentry, who’d been nonchalantly chatting with the new Chamber of Commerce President for much of the evening. After shooting the breeze for a moment or two, she’d asked my grandmother something (I can’t remember what) and, as usual, my grandmother responded. Now, apparently, I’m the “creative type,” whatever the hell that means. Probably a knock at the fact that I refuse to bring home the good ol’ Christian boy of Joyce’s dreams. 

Sometimes I really wish she’d just go out and say what she meant. To hell with all this “Southern Lady Code” bullshit. If she wanted to call me a helplessly ugly lesbian with more mental illnesses than IQ points, she really should have just come out and said it. But no. Of course not. It had to be dainty. Well, “creative” my ass. If that’s what she wants, that’s what she’ll get.

Process Notes:

I acquired the above definition from a book that I came across in the Bookstacks called Southern Lady Code. My original plan was to work out of a copy of Emily Post’s Etiquette, and I may eventually write that story, but the “Southern Lady Code” definition felt very fitting. I wrote this piece from the perspective of a less-than-sober character who resembles myself in many ways. She has an overbearing grandmother and had faked her way into Southern society before leaving for college. When a similar thing happened to me, I didn’t react with the anger of this story’s narrator, but I thought it would be interested to address what would have happened if I did. Originally, I also wrote a dialogue involving this character and another that may very well end up in my final portfolio, but I’m not so sure. Anyway, this piece wasn’t too difficult to write. Honestly, it was kind of fun to isolate one of these moments and blow it up to this proportion. Also, highly recommend the book that inspired this piece! So funny!

These are three definitions of homosexuality, homosexualism, and homosexual provided by a Christian website called Christian Reformed Church (https://www.crcna.org/welcome/beliefs/position-statements/homosexuality).  

Their definitions 

Homosexuality: a condition of personal identity in which a person is sexually oriented toward persons of the same sex.

Homosexualism: explicit and overt homosexual practice.

Homosexual: a person who has erotic attractions for members of the same sex and who may or may not actually engage in homosexualism.

My definitions

Homosexuality: an identity assumed by individuals who are sexually and/or romantically attracted to members of the same sex. 

Explanation: The word “condition” implies that homosexuality can be likened to disease or serious impairment. It also implies that homosexuality can be treated or cured. Additionally, one can use the label of homosexual to describe their romantic attraction to the same sex as well as their sexual one. 

Homosexualism: the practice of homosexuality 

Explanation: I believe that this term is just a less useful synonym for homosexuality, but if it is to be used, nothing about the word homosexualism denotes acts that are “explicit” or “overt.” 

Homosexual: a person who is attracted to members of the same sex and/or gender 

Explanation: I feel as though this definition provided by Christian Reform Church is the least problematic of these definitions as it is fairly neutral and recognizes that one can assume a certain identity without participating in certain acts. However, I believe that this part of the definition was not necessary. Also, I believe that the term “erotic” is quite inappopriate here, as it implies that a homosexual person is a highly sexual being. 

Notes: 

While I believe that these definitions from a Christian website defined homosexuals/homsexuality correctly in some capacity, I believe that whomever wrote these definitions completely left out the identity factor of homosexuality and instead focused on the sexual parts. I believe this is because while the Catholic Church does not prohibit homosexual identity, it does restrict any homosexual acts. Therefore, by attaching sex acts as a necessary component of the definitions, sex acts and identity are inevitably being linked, and perpetuating the sin of homosexuality.

I lie on my back restless in the dark. This is the third night in the last week that I haven’t been able to sleep. I feel Liam breathing peacefully next to me. I don’t want to wake him up. He has to work early in the morning, and honestly, there’s nothing that he can do to help. So, I gently slide out of bed and creep into the living room. Dropping down on the couch, I turn on the TV and try to zone out. If I stare at the bright screen enough, my eyes will begin to get tired and back to bed I can go. Just 3-4 hours of sleep, but still sleep, nonetheless.

Yet, an hour later, I am still flipping back and forward between channels. In a desperate attempt to make some progress toward sleep, I open Twitter. To my delight, I am bombarded with a constant stream of jokes that cause me to muffle my laughter as not to awake Liam.

I’m not exactly sleepy, but at least I’m in a good mood… Suddenly, a tweet towards the bottom of my timeline captures my attention: “A hospital nearly killed Serena Williams because she was a black woman telling the staff what she needed and the nurses and doctors thought they knew better. Tell me how Medicare for all will stop healthcare professionals from discriminating against us and treating us like fools.” Just as it always is when a serious tweet appears in the long stream of light-heartedness that I enjoy seeing on my timeline, my initial reaction is to ignore it. I don’t want to be sad. I don’t want to think right now. I want to sleep. I want a good night’s sleep. With good dreams. So, I do. I keep scrolling. Until I found something else funny.

And it works…until I refresh my timeline. And suddenly, Serena’s name is everywhere. In fact, it’s trending. I can’t ignore it anymore. I scroll through tweet after tweet commenting on Serena’s horrible hospital experience.

As I begin to go further down the rabbit hole, I hear footsteps behind me.

“Can’t sleep again?”

I look up to see Liam staring down at me, a look of concern on his face.

“Yeah. Sorry, did I wake you up?”

“No, I just turned over and the bed felt empty.” There’s a pause. “You should ask for less hours at the office. You’re overworked.”

“I know. I have a meeting with my boss tomorrow.”

He nods. “Heading back yet?”

“In a minute.”

“What’s wrong?”

I show him the tweet.

He rolls his eyes. “So the doctors made a mistake. It’s not because she’s black. Jesus.” And with an irritated sigh, he heads back into the room.

But I continue to stare at my phone, pleading my eyes to tire.

Writer’s Notes: Instead of focusing directly on the issue of Serena (and other African American women) being ignored by health officials, I wanted to focus on the attempt to ignore this tweet, which indirectly means exploring black women’s voices being ignored by the everyday person. It’s hard for the issue to be represented because anything bringing awareness to the issue is pushed to the side. In this piece, both the main character and Liam are dismissive. In my mind, I imagine the main character as African American, but I thought it would be interesting to explore how minorities can ignore voices from their own people that affects them also. I did find it difficult to resist not going into the issue itself.

Although the events of “Sabrina” are horrific, I found it interesting that there is a sense of “everydayness” that runs throughout the story. This can be seen through the drawing of the characters, the color scheme used, etc. For example, I found that most of the characters did not have very distinct facial features. At first, I found this very jarring because it was hard to tell characters apart. It was as if everyone had the same face with different colored hair. But then, I realized that this could be because Drnaso wanted readers to focus on how the story could happen to anyone. Specifically, there is a focus on becoming desensitized to tragedies because so many occur. It is then very easy for the readers to put themselves in the place of the characters. I think the drawing of the characters aid to this.

Even the background designs and the color scheme are very plain, dull, and not as detailed. It just makes everything feel very normal. I don’t think I’ve seen it done much in any of the graphical novels that I’ve read (which is limited). I find Chloe (M)’s point about the moments in the novel in which the normal color scheme is interrupted to be very interesting also. For example, she talks about how Calvin has a dream about Sabrina’s murderer and it is in black and white (which doesn’t happen for many other scenes) and yet it is not a very accurate description of what happened. I found that the representation of the interpretations of the events of Sabrina’s death was very well done. They all occur through some normal medium (radio, emails, etc) against very normal, dull color schemes/ backgrounds. So, comparing this to Chloe’s point, new information changes our perception of events and this is shown in dreams and everyday settings, but using different stylistic choices.

Revision #1: To be beheld in its endless tangle of fabric, one is not flattered. Expanding with a single motion and sometimes semi-translucent. Ill-fitted. Achromatic most of the time… or with azure dots dashing across it. Or light green. But it’s not the hue that preoccupies you. This garment…this garb…signals a malfunction… within you. A diagnosis embedded in between its fibers. A reconstruction of your life. It scratches at your skin. Ownership is not really yours. Or hers. Or his. When you leave, you will have to give it back and some other unfortunate entity will soon adorn it. Some who have worn it have walked out the doors of the infirmary. And some have not. For some, this is the last garment.

Revision #2: Draping below your knees, it hangs despairingly. Rectangular and semi-transparent. Prosopagnosia. Hemi spatial neglect. Aphantasia. The diagnosis could present itself in any of these forms. Where does the fibers that stitch together this gown come from? Gossypium arboretum, G. herbaceum, G. hirsutum? These terms rush into your head faster than you realize. When did you store them? And why are you recalling them now? This is your defense mechanism. The reciting. Your head is an endless encyclopedia and yet, this garment is your final verdict.

Writer’s Notes: I found this assignment to be very difficult because I usually tend to lean more towards using simple language when writing. During the first revision, it was hard for me to get rid of the everyday words. I started off by trying to use synonyms to give me some inspiration. Unfortunately, I think my first revision comes off as a weird mixture of “wordy,” but still includes everyday words from my first free-write. During the second revision, I wanted to highlight the fear of diagnosis while wearing a hospital gown. I imagined a character that knew a lot of random, unique terms sitting nervously in a hospital room awaiting her diagnosis. So, I looked up really specific diagnoses and similarly, looked up different cotton hybrid varieties to describe the fabric of the hospital gown. Overall, this assignment definitely challenged me to begin to think about “exactness” and it’s something that I want to continue to improve on.

I found the stylistic choices of the Counter-Desecration glossary very interesting, considering the entries were very different from normal glossary entries. In particular, each entry seems to be unique in its own way. The first entry for “attention” seems to be most traditional. The description used seems to be what one would typically expect to find for attention in a standardized dictionary: “directed mental, physical, and spiritual awareness.” However, as you move down the list of entries, there is more liberty taken with the language used. For example, the definition for “atoll,” is presented through a historical lens: “Nation-states in atolls preemptively insulate themselves by building walls of increasing heights. The goal is a state where no one can see out and realize the need to get out, and where no one can see in/ come in.” I found this to be very interesting given the topic of the glossary: counter-desecration. The author of this entry is choosing to focus on describing a nation’s defense against desecration or a change in attitude to prevent it from reoccurring in the future. By framing the definition in this way, the reader is better able to understand the purpose of this term being included for this particular topic. I think it’s also a good way to offer perspective from those impacted from land being desecration.

In contrast to the entries for “attention” and “atoll,” the language used for the “azhigwa” entry is more free-flow. It comes across as very conversational: “now is not the time for grief or silence…listen to their songs.” This is made apparent also by the use of “we”: “we are alive.” The author is directly talking to the reader.  It makes the reader pay attention and to visualize growth after destruction.

The entry for “betweenness” also evokes a sense of intimacy with the use of “I”: “I think of that hyphenated space as a “trans-poetics…” It a transfer of experience. I also find it interesting that this entry connects back to the first entry for attention: “Attention to being between is one way to locate the murmur of our intersections with place, that one is somewhere, not everywhere.” So although these entries were written by different people and take on different formatting, there is still a conscious decision for them to be connected.

The presence of the “now” is focused on throughout the descriptions of the entries. This is hinted at with the title: “Writing within the Anthropocene.” Anthropocene is defined as “the current geological age, viewed as the period during which human activity has been the dominant influence on climate and the environment.” In his discussion post, Sham also mentioned the focusing on “now” in nature and with the standardized definition of azhigwa: “now, at this time.” I think that by doing this, desecration is described as active and the change that occurs because of this is highlighted. Overall, by playing around with the formatting of entries, the reader’s attention is captured more and seems less like a lecture.

From: Hardman, John. “The Great Depression and the New Deal.” Ethics of Development in a Global Environment (EDGE), Stanford University, 26 July 1999, web.stanford.edu/class/e297c/poverty_prejudice/soc_sec/hgreat.htm.

The following passage is taken from a web post written by a Stanford student about the Great Depression and the New Deal. While it is not a professional history, it is representative of common misconceptions about the New Deal and its effects on different groups of people. Footnotes are not allowed in this text editor, so I’ve added them as italicized parentheticals.

Blacks in the Depression and the New Deal

The Great Depression of the 1930s worsened the already bleak economic situation of black Americans (This is true). African Americans were the first people to be fired from their jobs as they suffered from an unemployment rate two to three times that of whites. In early public assistance programs blacks often received substantially less aid than whites (yup), and some charitable organizations even excluded blacks from their soup kitchens. It was an extremely poor and desperate time for most African Americans (mmhmm).

The black American’s economic struggles sparked major political developments among the blacks. Beginning in 1929, the St. Louis Urban League launched a national “jobs for Negroes” movement by boycotting chain stores that had mostly black customers but hired only white employees. Efforts to unify black organizations and youth groups later led to the founding of the National Negro Congress in 1936 and the Southern Negro Youth Congress in 1937.

The Roosevelt Administration’s accessibility to black leaders and the New Deal reforms strengthened black support for the Democratic party Roosevelt bad many black leaders, members of a so-called “black Cabinet,” were served as advisers to him. Among them were the educator Mary McLeod Bethune, who served as the National Youth Administration’s director of Negro affairs; William H. Hastie, who in l937 became the first black federal judge; Eugene K. Jones, executive secretary of the National Urban League; Robert Vann, editor of the Pittsburgh Courier; and the economist Robert C Weaver.4

Blacks benefited greatly from New Deal programs though discrimination by local administrators was common. Low-cost public housing was made available to black families ( I need to tell you the story of how I “benefited greatly from New Deal programs.” Two years ago, I lost my job at the meatpacking plant. It wasn’t a fun job; I’ve seen my coworkers and friends lose fingers to the spinning saws, and I myself have a scar running from the tip of my elbow down and around to the base of my thumb, ripped open by a jagged shard of leg bone three months after I started work. When I lost my job, I didn’t panic. I’d seen in the Defender that the economy was in a downturn, but at that point I think we all thought that it would be over soon. It’s lasted so much longer than any of us expected. We’ve found ways to turn salt pork, beans, and the occasional chicken foot into email, but it honestly doesn’t resemble what we used to eat. No matter, Alma doesn’t seem to remember what we used to eat, and my wife and I would eat stones to keep a roof over our heads.
I saw my buddy Frank from the plant the other day. I was in line at the government office down on Michigan, hoping beyond hope that I’d get enough to make it through the week. Frank was taking the streetcar East to the lake from the white neighborhood he lives in, but when he saw me he got off and we got to talking.He told me what he’s been up to and my mind was blown. Two weeks after being laid off, he found a job on a WPA construction project digging a tunnel along State under the Loop for a subway. I couldn’t believe it. Nobody in my neighborhood had even heard of such a thing. From what he said, I guess they have some Blacks on the job, but they’re the kind of people who lived up North before the crash, who used to work in the skyscrapers downtown. Nobody from my neighborhood was working there. There’s no end in sight for me. But at least Frank’s doing well.). The National Youth Administration and the Civilian Conservation Corps enabled black youths to continue their education. The Work Projects Administration gave jobs to many blacks, and its Federal Writers Project supported the work of many authors, among them Zora Neale Hurston, Arna Bontemps, Waters Turpin, and Melvin B. Tolson.

The Congress of Industrial Organizations (CIO); established in the mid-1930s, organized large numbers of black workers into labor unions for the first time. By 1940, there were more than 200,000 blacks in the CIO, many of them officers of union locals.

Process Notes:

I originally set out to write about the debate over past political debates, looking for descriptions of the New Deal debate, but I found this. In a class entitled Introduction to Black Chicago, we just learned about Black Chicagoans during the Depression. Although the City of Chicago did benefit greatly from New Deal programs, Black Chicagoans were generally excluded from reaping most of the benefits. I decided to write about the daily life of one of those Chicagoans, how the Depression was experienced by different people, and how he would have learned this in an extremely segregated city.